Understanding psychotherapy

What “Transference,” “Countertransference,” and “Regression” Really Mean**

Psychotherapy doesn't just work through conversations. It works through the therapeutic relationship.

Many of the most important processes in therapy occur unconsciously—and there are terms for precisely this, which often sound daunting but are incredibly helpful when understood correctly.

I encounter three of them almost daily: transference, countertransference, and regression.

1. Transference: When old relationship patterns resurface in the here and now

Transference means that past relationship experiences—usually from childhood—are unconsciously projected onto the therapist.

Typical examples:

The therapist is perceived as strict, cold, or critical.

Or as particularly understanding, protective, or idealized.

Intense fear of disappointment or abandonment.

Excessive need for validation.

Important: 👉 These reactions don't primarily reflect on the therapist, but rather on past attachment experiences.

Transference is not a flaw—it is a key factor in the effectiveness of psychotherapy.

2. Countertransference: The therapist's emotional response

Countertransference describes the therapist's emotional and physical reactions to the patient.

These include, for example:

sudden exhaustion

anger or impatience

excessive empathy

the feeling of needing to help or rescue

In modern psychotherapy, countertransference is not considered a disruptive factor, but rather a diagnostic tool.

It provides clues about the underlying relationship patterns – especially when consciously reflected upon.

3. Regression: When old defense mechanisms become active again

Regression means that people in stressful situations revert to earlier developmental stages.

This can manifest as:

increased dependency

a desire for guidance or support

more childlike reactions

emotional overwhelm triggered by minor events

Regression is not a step backward in a negative sense. It shows that the nervous system is seeking protection.

In a safe therapeutic relationship, regression can:

provide stabilization

make old traumas accessible

promote sustainable development

Why these processes are so important

Many people expect therapy to be:

"I come, I talk, I get solutions."

But true change often occurs where:

Feelings are unsettling

Relationships are challenged

Old patterns become visible

This is precisely where transference, countertransference, and regression take effect.

A common misconception

These processes do not mean that:

the therapy is going badly

someone is "too sensitive"

something has gone wrong

On the contrary: 👉 They often show that the therapy is going deep.

My Clinical Perspective

Psychotherapy isn't about making feelings disappear. It's about supporting you in learning how to manage them.

Psychotherapy isn't a neutral space devoid of emotions. It's a relational field where old inner maps become visible.

Not through analysis alone—but through what happens between two people.

Key takeaway:

If you experience strong emotions in therapy—or suddenly find yourself in a different light than expected:

👉 This is not unusual.

👉 Often, this is where real change begins.